Thursday, March 31, 2011

Stabilizing and maintaining

The last week has actually gone very well. This morning I weighed in at 224.7 and this evening, about half an hour ago, I already weighed in at 224.2. So I'll be in the 223's at least by the time I get up.

Being able to eat real food again has been a blessing. I've been having a lemon soy yogurt with a hemp and flax granola for lunch every day. My calories the last couple of days have been below 1000, but I'm just not hungry. So it's okay. I'm trying to find the balance between what I can eat and what my body will allow me to eat without much consequence. Yesterday, I also had a ginormous 12 oz steak and a tomato (the recommended protocol if you've seen an increase of weight of more than 2 lbs since stopping the drops) and it definitely worked. Although, I had a horrible, violent reaction to something last night that caused my intestines to clear out. It felt like it was going to be food poisoning (you know, where it's coming out both ends at the same time?) but luckily after a half hour of switching from sitting on the pot because I felt like I was going to have an ass-plosion and laying on the floor because I was near fainting and didn't want to hit my head on anything if I did (my blood pressure had to be through the roof), it subsided and I was able to crawl back in bed without incident. So that all happened around 11:45 pm. I was awake until well after 2 am trying to fall back asleep. My insomnia gets the best of me sometimes. It's a real pain. Just like now, it's 11 pm and I'm pretty alert and awake.

Isaac is ahead of me on the weight loss. I was about 5 lbs ahead of him the whole time, but now he's dropped down to 216 after four days of plateauing. He decided to prep his food different and use different vegetables, and it seemed to get him going again on the weight loss. So that's good for him. His belly is definitely going away. I wish mine would. *sigh*

Next week (or this weekend) I'm going to be starting my marathon training. I want to give myself about a year, but I think I have to pick a marathon to do so that I can go backwards in the training schedule and see when I should start the increase in miles. It starts off at 15 miles per week and gradually increases to where your one long run of the week is 18 miles for two weeks before backing off the two weeks prior to the marathon. So that's where the back peddling comes in.

Anyway, I'm going to go curl up on the couch and try to get tired. One thing that has been a tremendous help the last couple days is the little arm BioMedia Fit thingie that I bought a few months ago. While it doesn't track your heart rate, it does calculate your perceived exertion by measuring your body temp and moisture from the skin. Plus it has an accelerometer to measure movement and how many steps you're taking, blah blah blah. It's the same thing that they use on The Biggest Loser (the BodyBugg), just called something different. Same manufacture, I found out. Just 24-Hour Fitness seems to have it's claim on the BodyBugg (and a huge price increase because of the branding) and BodyMedia is much cheaper and there's a steep discount on Costco to buy the unit and you get 12 months of the subscription service included for like $160. The price seems to fluctuate throughout the month, but I highly recommend it. I'll write more about it in my next posting because there are some cautions I'd advise if you do purchase one.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Some extra thoughts

So, I was going to give it a second chance today if my weight indeed dropped down to the 223's or lower. I thought it might because before I went to bed I was 224.6 and most nights I will drop at least two pounds by the morning.

What did I weigh this morning?

224.2

I ate two apples and a latte yesterday. And I pooped. When I got home around 3 pm, I had weighed myself and it was like 225.7 with a shirt on, so I was like... this is cool. Didn't drink or eat anything the rest of the day, and that's when I had that 224.6 before bed.

Between that frustration and this horrible itchy elbow thing I've had for the last week, I really am at peace with stopping this round. I'm pretty sure the elbows are a rash as I had forgotten to bring my drops with me to work yesterday. They had itched really bad in the morning and it eventually tapered off. I didn't get my second dose until probably 4 pm, and after I took it, my elbows got super itchy again. My skin looks like crap from not being able to use the face and body products I usually use. And my pants are falling off. Even my tight pants. Which aren't tight anymore.

I'm suppose to stick to 500 calories today and two more days after, but I'm not sure if that will happen. I had a latte again this morning since I had decided that I'm stopping the HCG, and I had an apple. I've been tempted to walk next door to get a sandwich, but I think I'll save that for tomorrow and get a veggie sub somewhere. I'm still really interested to see how full I get after a month of eating hardly anything. I do feel my confidence has gone up. Maybe it's because my underwear is baggy (luckily Victoria's Secret has a panty sale starting tomorrow!!). Or maybe it's because I know I lost over 15 pounds in a month and my clothes fit the way they're suppose to, or looser. It was definitely an experience, and an experience I would be willing to try again if my marathon training doesn't give me a side-effect of losing weight too. (It should, when I first started running and prepping for a 5k a few years ago, my legs got sexy sculpted and I was losing weight at a decent pace.) But the thing I like most about running is that it's a time to be by myself and reflect on things. 26 miles is a lot of reflecting, though. I look at some of the maps of previous marathons that were held in Seattle and when I look at it that way I'm like... oh crap. I'm pretty sure I'll end up signing up for one down in Arizona during the winter months... probably March. Dry air makes running easier, regardless what the temps are. I was able to run out in Idaho in 80+ degrees because of the constant Palouse breeze and 15% humidity. But I really want to do the marathon before I'm 30. It's something that I can say "less than 1% of the population has ever completed a marathon, and I'm one of them." All I want to do is finish. I don't care what time I come in with... finishing is the goal.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Calling it quits, for now...

I've basically come to terms with the fact that I need to stop the drops for a bit. I haven't lost any weight since Sunday (been 224.3 Tuesday and Wednesday) and I've been extra hungry lately. With both factors at play, I think I'm ready to wean myself off of the drops, taper, and start the stabilization phase. I should be in the 223's tomorrow and that keeps me at a 17 lb weight loss while on the drops over a 29 day period. And you know what? I'm really happy with that. It's far better than I could have done on my own since I eat very healthy to begin with and I've never experienced that big drop during the first week because I don't have the water weight on me to lose.

With today being SUCH a beautiful day in Seattle, it's really got me itching to start running and get headed toward my goal for my 30th birthday. I feel confident that I've got a grip on what I need to do again and I'm damn near close to 40 lbs down from my peak weight several years ago. It's taken far longer than I expected to lose weight, but that's life. And it's still to be determined why it is so difficult for me to lose weight as well.

Anyway, I'm at peace with my decision. Today will be my last day on the drops and by this weekend I'll be able to eat like a normal person again. Honestly, I can't wait to have some soy lemon yogurt and eggs and turkey bacon. And toast with peanut butter and jelly... mmmm...

Sunday, March 20, 2011

My first gain... and an allergy discussion

Today was the first day the scale went up in this experience. Well, aside from the load days.

Yesterday it was 223.7, this morning it was 224.4. It could be one of two things: I had a diet cherry 7-Up because I was dying for something cold (the water from the tap was luke warm at it's coldest and it wasn't getting rid of the feeling in my throat) or it was the soy latte in addition to two meals and one apple. It is possible I'm actually retaining water for once because I do feel extremely swollen and lethargic today.

Then today, I've done nothing but nibble on things I've sealed up that I've been wanting. Partly because I'm getting really kind of sick of not eating anything but chicken and broccoli or lettuce. And apples. I've had a couple apples, some chocolate, some swedish fish, and a couple pistachios. So I really have no idea what to expect tomorrow. I just miss flavors. I'm craving lamb curry like crazy.

With those cravings, I've contemplated ending this round earlier than I anticipated. I've hit 23 days now and I've lost over 15 pounds which is more than I could have ever expected from something. I would still like to see 215 before I stop, so we'll see how the next couple days go. I'm going to cook some chicken in a reduced orange sauce tonight and see if that helps me tolerate this a bit longer. I'm really only halfway through if I go the whole term, so again... we'll see. I'm also looking forward to being able to eat again and get going on my goal for my 30th birthday. I can't get back into running without taking in more calories. Playing with my friend's toddler yesterday wore me out very, very quickly. Once I'm done I'm going to resume a 1400-1600 calorie diet and see what happens. I really can't wait to have some fruit and eggs for breakfast again. Or lemon soy yogurt.

Oh, I almost completely forgot. Since this diet has kept me 100% away from dairy all the time, my allergies don't exist. I've noticed this the last several months once I decided to stop eating dairy and not even sneak a bit of cheese just because the amount of pain my body experiences when I eat it just kills me. And it might kill me because when I do have dairy, it's a complete food allergy reaction where my heart rate increases, my throat gets swollen and itchy... that kind of stuff, despite how much I love diary. Anyway, now that it's spring and all the trees are pollinating, this has always been the worst time for my allergies. And you know what? I have not taken allergy medication since November. And I haven't been snotty or having problems breathing, or anything that resembles a pollen/pet dander allergy. How absolutely crazy is that? It makes me wonder if more people cut dairy out of the lives, if it would help. I know a lot of people have dairy and wheat allergies, but because they've eaten it all their lives, they don't recognize the symptoms.

I still could go for a pizza and a cheeseburger, though. Mmmm...

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Halfway through...

Well, about halfway through. I guess I'm not quite at that point, yet. Whatever. It's all good.

Weighed in the same yesterday and today at 225.7. I felt really bloated this morning, so I knew I wasn't going to see a loss. I think it has to do with the strawberries I'm eating. When I eat them, I don't lose weight. So luckily I finished those off this afternoon and I'm going to skip dinner and hope everything returns tomorrow. I'm also going to have an apple day tomorrow since I didn't pull any meat out of the freezer last night to cook tonight. I'm definitely doing the baked chicken nuggets again. I'm tempted to get a toaster oven so I don't have to heat the big oven. But then that leaves me with a toaster oven and a toaster. When really, all I need to do is just cut back on the cooking time on the nuggets I made the other day. And I had the nuggets cold this afternoon for lunch, which were a lot better than trying to reheat them in the microwave, which just made them even drier and difficult to scarf down.

Not sure what's going on with my period. I spotted a little on Sunday, just barely on Monday, and now there's nothing. I do feel extra depressed today and in need of a long cry, which happens before my period every couple of months. And my boobs are sore. Another sign. I'm pretty sure that my period is going to be delayed or just pass on by without stopping due to the low calorie intake. Nutrients are low and my body's probably like... well, uh... it isn't like you're having sex so why bother? Ha. I wish.

I think I'll start posting what I'm eating to help anyone get some ideas. It's really boring, though. I don't do anything fabulous and innovative. Although I do want to try making an orange reduction for some chicken and/or veggies and see how that goes. It bugs me that stevia is used in a lot of recipes, but I can't tolerate stevia unless I want to feel like I've been poisoned for 24 hours. Like a lot of experts say, everyone's going to tolerate everything differently. For me, I can't do the strawberries or stevia. But I can do broccoli. Man, I can't wait to make some tomato sauce and pasta when I'm done with this.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

New recipe that was omnom-licious

A few days ago, my friend Isaac told me about how some people are crushing up the melba toast and using it as a breading for the chicken to give it some variety. I still had a ton of the plain, whole wheat melba toast that I haven't bothered to eat (it tastes like cardboard, literally) so I decided to hell with it and gave it a shot today, mixing it in with some of the Tony's Creole seasoning that is just amazing on almost anything.

Oh. My. God.

IT WAS ABSOLUTELY DELICIOUS!!! It satisfied that chicken nugget craving I've been having since before the binge days (that second binge day, I just was not hungry at all so I didn't get to eat a lot of foods that I wish I would have eaten) and made my tummy super, super happy. It will probably be what I do the remainder on the protocol. I want to go in the fridge and eat the other three servings I cooked at the same time. As far as what I did, I just breaded them and let the breading stick with the stickiness of the chicken breast, stuck it in the oven at 350 for 35 minutes and it was done. I'd probably do it for 25-30 minutes next time, depending on how big the pieces are that you cut them up into. Man that was good. Omnomnomnom.

Today was the last day of Girl Scout cookie sales, so I bought three boxes this morning. While at Cambria's yesterday, I was ravenous (she got the kids McD's for breakfast and for lunch) so I had five fries, a Starburst, and then saw the cookies and had one. She just had the Sanoma's, but again, really low blood sugar, just needed to get something in me. I had no idea those things were just large macaroons. I LOVE macaroons. So I bought two boxes of those and a box of Thin Mints for when I'm done. Omnomnomnomnom.

Today also marked the start of my period. So now I'm at this point where, do I stop the drops for a few days like Dr. Simeon's protocol says? Keeping in mind, his protocol is for injections. A lot of people are reporting that on the homeopathic drops, they're not having an increased flow or cramps, or they're at least tolerable while on their period. Sooooooo... I dunno. I'm pretty hungry now, but that's cause all I've had today was two apples and a serving of chicken.

This morning I weighed in at 226.4. Pretty close to hitting a 225 on Monday. I took some vitamins to help compensate for the lack of food for the last couple days and hoping that my .5lb/day+ loss will continue to let me see that number I want to see. I'm also hoping that with my period finally showing up, I'll resume a higher weight loss than the slowish stuff I've been seeing. I've been reading some people's comments and they're daily tracking and some people that are in the mid-100s have been able to lose like 5 lbs in one day. WTF? Where's MY 5lb drop in one day? *pouts*

Oh, yesterday I also ended up going for a very, very long walk with Cambria's husband and two kids. It wasn't suppose to be a long one, but it turned into three-ish miles. But that's okay. It either helped or hindered the .8 lbs I saw from yesterday morning to this morning. Wait, I need to make a clarification. 3 miles being a very, very long walk as in the walk we were SUPPOSE to do was .6 miles. I had no energy that day (no food) and it was my first physical exertion since being on the diet. It was hard. Typically three miles is easy-peasy for me as I've done plenty of 5K's and can't wait to get back into jogging. I also have a goal of doing a marathon either on, before, or just after my 30th birthday. (It won't be ON the day cause it's on a Wednesday or something this year.) The longest hike I've done is 11 miles, so again, to me at least, 3 miles ain't nothing on a normal day.

I've got a few pounds of strawberries and the chicken and some lettuce to get me through the next couple of days. Plus apples. I also bought an orange to try and make an orange reduction with the chicken (or an orange glaze of some sort) this week. I'll have to wing it, but I'm sure it'll be a nice change of pace than the poached chicken with Tony's seasoning I've been eating the last two weeks. :)

Friday, March 11, 2011

I want more food

Well, the measurements didn't show much change. The scale didn't show much change either.

I stepped on this morning to see 228.0 - I got pretty mad at the scale, stomped off and diddled around for awhile, stepped back on to see 227.9. I'll take that. kthx.

Last night and today I'm craving the hell out of grapefruit juice. It's getting really annoying. I also had a soy latte this morning. It was weird tasting it since I haven't had one in over two weeks, and it was much, much sweeter than I remember. But it tasted so good.

I really, really want to hit the 225 range by Monday. Luckily with DST starting up again, it'll be light longer that I can start walking/jogging again. I'll have to keep it at a walk while I'm on this diet. I found that when I was standing for like 15 minutes this afternoon, I was getting weak. Sometimes when I get up from laying on the couch, I get really light-headed and dizzy, and my vision goes black for a second until I stop being dizzy. So it's almost like blacking out, but I'm still upright, standing, and conscious.

Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives is on. It's making me more hungry. I want regular food again so bad. Soooooo bad. Even string cheese commercials make me hungry.

Ugh...

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Plateaued a little...

Let's see, the last entry was on the 6th? So that was Sunday, I believe?

Sunday I weighed in at 230.2. I hung out with my friend after going to work for a little bit and he wanted to make a compliant meal for him and myself since he's doing the diet at the same time with me. Well, okay. We pick up a steak and some asparagus. We went by the weight on the package for the steak which was .55 lbs (so a little more than 4 oz split evenly). Well, once it was on my plate, it looked like a lot more than it was. Going against my gut, I ate it anyway. I hadn't eaten much of anything the rest of the day and was famished, so I figured it would be okay.

Nope!! The next day, Monday, I was EXACTLY the same weight. 230.2. Hmph.

So I follow the diet on target, Tuesday I came in at 229.8. HMPH!!!

Wednesday, 229.2. ARGH!! Although now that I've looked back on it, that was a .5 lb loss. But counting it from Sunday, it was only a pound. I wasn't happy. And I figured that was all poop anyway cause it was the first bowel movement I'd had since last Thursday.

With that frustration Wednesday morning, I decided it was going to be an Apple Day. I ended up only eating four apples instead of six, but it seems to have done the job. I weighed in this morning at 228.3 and feel okay about it.

But then I get discouraged again. If we take my true starting weight from Day 1, I'm down 8 pounds over two weeks. And really, I'm only down 11 pounds if you count the bloat I had from eating on the gorge days. I really wanted to hit 225 by this Friday, but that's obviously not going to happen unless a miracle comes shining down on me in the middle of the night.

However, I've got to say, I'm still happy about where I'm at now. It's getting me back down where I know I need to be. My 228 puts me back at my original goal loss of 25 lbs from my peak weight. And generally speaking, this has been a much easier process, with a few struggles here and there, than I could ever have imagined. I'm looking forward to being done with this round and getting active again. Just blow drying my hair yesterday made my arms fatigued all day. I'm going to go ahead and start doing some light strength moves to keep my muscles from getting too atrophied. Hopefully it'll help rev my metabolism just a hair to keep seeing at least a .5 lb loss per day. I know the numbers will add up. I'm still not halfway through the bottle, so there's plenty of time to keep going. And I'm still anxiously awaiting to see if my period is going to show up this month or not.

The food cravings are still there, though they're easier to fight. A slice of cheese pizza from Costco still sounds amazing, as well as a huge burger, chinese take out, sushi, McDonald's (as bad as it is nutritionally and animal ethics), french toast, eggs and bacon, ice cream, Jimmy John's... all of it. Hell, even cereal!! I can't wait to incorporate that back into my diet. In moderation, of course. Small sizes and once a week will probably be the theme. I'm getting very use to the portion sizes, which is awesome. I'm becoming full on the dismal amount of meat and vegetable I'm eating for my meals.

Measurements are up for tomorrow. I'll be posting again then to see if anything has changed. With last week's measurements, I started thinking that I may have been sucking in on the original starting base measurements and that's why I didn't see any change. They always tell you to suck in, and I should have remembered I did that, but oh well.

I still feel really good and clear headed. So I'm in a happy place. I've decided that if I can get to 215 lbs by the time this is over, I will be quite pleased. Then I'll go on to the stabilization and maintenance phases for six weeks and try to lose a little more weight through diet and exercise. If I'm still struggling after 6-8 weeks of not being on HCG, then I'll probably start a second round. If the weight is coming off at 2 lbs a week, then I will probably hold off on it.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Trudging along

Today was a struggle again. Oh crap, I just realized I forgot my drops in the car. Crap. Whatever. Anyway. I don't know if it was just my timing, or what's going on, but I was just hungry. Well, I take that back. I hadn't eaten hardly anything most of the day so I was having a serious blood sugar crash around 5 pm. All shaky and what-not.

This entry is going to be brief. I'm just exhausted and sleepy. Went to work for a little bit this afternoon to help my boss get caught up. In the past, we've always closed the month prior by the fifth of the next month (so February should be done by March 5). But she hasn't even started February, so I decided to help out a bit. It's hard being spread out in different offices and still trying to communicate with each other effectively.

Anyway, scale said 230.2 this morning. I was hoping for a high 229, but I can't cry over that. It's either a 1.3 lb loss or a .7 lb loss, depending on which figure you use from the day before. I officially wrote down the 231.5 in my log, and scribbled the 230.9 next to it as a note for myself that a half hour later, that's what I weighed.

Did have a little steak tonight. That was a nice break. Isaac cooked for me, so a break from poached chicken and a handful of tomatoes was a welcomed change. I might have to go buy more steak. I hate not being able to do vegan on this, but oh well. Just be conscious of where my meat is coming from and it'll be okay, right? Right.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Soooo hungry today...

Well, it's more like the last hour I've been letting my food cravings get into my brain. I somehow survived going to Johnny Rocket's this afternoon with only getting an iced tea. The sandwich my friend was consuming looked so delicious. Bacon, bbq sauce, melted cheese, onion rings, and chicken on toasted bread. Oooohhhh my god it looked so good. At that point, I was still good. But right now, all I want is... everything.

Anyway, weighed in at 230.9 this morning. Talking to Isaac a few hours ago, he feels like he's stalled out and was only down .2 lbs this morning. I'll admit, I did first weigh myself at 231.5, and then a half hour later I hopped on the scale again once I was up for awhile and functioning, like I normally do during the week. I don't really care. It's still going down. I should be in the 220s by Monday, and I'm pretty sure the weight loss will start to slow down after Monday.

A lot of my food struggle today is that PMS food craving that I always get. It starts about 10 days before my period. Whether I actually get a period this month or not is yet to be determined. While my cycle has never been all that regular (as a teen it was every six weeks), the last few months while being on the cabergoline for the brain tumor it has become more regular on its own. Eating only 500 calories a day, I feel like this might hinder the biological process because you are functioning on so little food. However, the theory is that the HCG is suppose to teach your body to use the fat that you've been storing for all these years for fuel and quit using the food which is the easiest source.

My non-scale victory? I noticed this yesterday, but noticed it moreso today. While my measuring was lame, my boobs now stick out further than my belly again. And while walking around U-Village with Cambria this afternoon, I wasn't feeling the friction of my middle roll on my shirt. Cause the shirt wasn't even touching the roll!! SQUEE!!! And I feel really great overall today. I have energy, I don't feel tired, I do have cottonmouth for some reason, so I've upped my fluid intake a lot. I think I'm going to skip dinner tonight, mostly because I don't have any unthawed food and it will take too long to wait for that to thaw out. I'll probably cut up a cucumber and call it good. If that. I dunno. I'm still absolutely floored with feeling so good on so little food.

It's still hard. I'm craving the hell out of a milkshake, ice cream brownie sundae, chicken nuggets, burgers, ribs, fries... all of it. In a month I'll be able to eat it again, but in extreme moderation. I'm excited to move forward and figure out what my diet and exercise will need to be in order to maintain whatever I end up losing.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Day 6 Completed

Weighed myself this morning, and I was only down a half pound from yesterday. My weight was 232.1; which I can't really complain about, can I? Sure, it's only 4 lbs (exactly) from my starting weight, but if you include the 4 lb gain over the weekend from the gorge sessions, then it's 8 pounds. But whatever. It's going down, that's all I should care about. Measurements didn't go as expected. Or as I hoped. Or something. I'm clearly not measuring around the same areas as almost all the measurements went up except for my chest, which went down about half an inch.

I did have half a cookie yesterday, half of the half I did spit out after mulling it around in my mouth for awhile. I wonder how much that had to play with only dropping a half pound today. I also had a late dinner because yesterday was the first time that I wasn't actually hungry at normal dinner time. So 8:30 suddenly shows up and I'm like, crap!! I need to eat!! So I had some more poached chicken and some fresh grape tomatoes. I probably shouldn't have eaten. But, can't do anything about that now, can I? I nibbled on some apple chips as they came out of the oven for today's breakfast, too. So I might have had a little extra fruit, but I can't imagine that really having any play in the game.

Today I feel great. Yesterday was a bit burdensome with the headache I still had and ended up taking a dose of Excedrin. That helped get rid of it, and I suspect the vitamins also helped out.

Oh, I should go back and talk more about the measurements. While what I measured did not reflect much of a change, my stomach roll doesn't stick out nearly as much as it use to. I'm measuring the folds in the rolls, not the rolls themselves, just for the sake of trying to measure in a consistent spot. It's awesome to finally see my boobs sticking out further than my belly again. And it has made wearing shirts the last two or three days wonderful because they're not as tight as they were not too long ago.

Today I'm trying out the six-dose program rather than the three-dose like I've been doing. Just to see if it help metabolize more or at least keep hunger at bay if it decides to say hello before I'm ready to eat. However, if I nearly forgot a meal last night, I might be okay with the three doses and I don't have to remember to take 2cc's every 2.5 hours.

And now the weekend is before me. I'm meeting up with a friend tomorrow in a shopping area, and I know she's going to want to eat out for lunch. I just have to decide what the hell I'm going to do to stay on track. I think I'll have to eat before I head out and tell her I'm just not hungry or something. It'll be hard. It'll be very, very hard. But I feel really great today. My body's gotten use to functioning on 500 calories of food and using the fat for the remaining energy I need. My taste buds are getting more sensitive so I can use less seasoning and enjoy food a bit better. I really appreciate how long the program is (minimum 26 days) which should enforce a habit to the people on it to eat healthy and whole foods and not think about food as pleasure, but as fuel. We'll see if it has a lasting effect on me, eh? ;)

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Background and Intro post - win!!

So I've tried doing weight loss blogs in the past doing the old exercise and diet routine. For the last year or so, my diet has cleaned up significantly to where I've also dabbled into veganism while excluding processed and refined sugars and oils, except for a little bit of olive oil when I roast or saute veggies. In July 2010, I had some general blood work done, assuming that I was heading toward a heart attack and getting back results that said my cholesterol and glucose levels were the shock therapy I needed in order to get myself focused on losing weight again. (I did lose 30 lbs from strict diet and exercise over the summer of 2008.) Well, those results come back, my fasting glucose was 86, cholesterol was 195, and most shocking was my triglycerides were at 50. Well, that wasn't the wake-up call I was looking for. I have the blood work of a triathlete. Hmph.

At that time I was also being tested for prolactin levels as I was having some issues with my body doing things that it really shouldn't be doing. Long story short, turns out I have a small brain tumor on my pituitary gland. Since that diagnosis, I've been reluctant to believe that the tumor has also playing a factor in my weight loss, or rather the lack thereof. And up until about a month ago, I still believed that.

Then comes last week, a close friend of mine mentions that someone we know mutually had started the sublingual HCG drops and was having some success with it, and his friend that turned him on to it had lost 150 lbs from it. After some hemming and hawing, I decided, to hell with it. It's only $100 and it's better than signing up for yet another gym membership that I never go to and throw money out the window. Or two more Xbox 360 games (Kinect is awesome, btw!!) or what have you.

The bottle comes, I decided that I was going to start that Friday, which was February 25. I stepped on the scale to see 236.1 which was lower than I was expecting. Not by much. I'm a daily weigher and was anticipating something in the 237 or 238 range. The first two days of the protocol tell you to eat to capacity the most fattening foods you can. And so I did. French toast, pizza, teriyaki, and McDonald's. Since I eat crazy healthy to begin with, all four meals were very difficult for me to consume because of the fat and fried content of everything. I gained a few pounds from that, obviously and was 239.9 on Saturday according to a friend's scale, but not my own. So there could have been some variance in there that I am unaware of.

Today is Day 5, so after four days of being on the drops, my weight this morning was 234.4. I'll take that. Each day since being on the 500-calorie diet has been a loss on the scale. I had an issue for the last few days of not pooping, and after the gorge-fest from last weekend, I knew there was tons in there just waiting to come out. A couple laxatives later, I was finally able to have a movement this morning. So now I don't feel so bad.

A lot of people did not report headaches or anything during the first week of the diet, but I'm definitely experiencing those lack of sugar headaches. Haven't taken anything for them yet, but they diminish shortly after eating a piece of fruit or taking some more drops. The fruit lasts longer than another dose of HCG. My muscles are sore like you're low on potassium, so I bought some supplements today (finally) to try and help that, too. I am longing for a chewy brownie, or one of the 180 cookies I had to buy for work, but I'm doing a very good job of saying no. I've had the equivalent of 1/3 of a chocolate chip cookie over the last two days. I took a bite today, rolled it around my mouth, and spit it out. People say that any deviation from the diet will make the scale stop, or even increase. And I can't risk that. I do have a few pieces of semi-sweet chocolate chips at night because I just need something. Otherwise, my diet has consisted of two pieces of fruit, two pieces of melba toast (blech), two 100g pieces of meat before cooking, and two 2-cup servings of either spinach or broccoli. Plain. That's been an adjustment in and of itself. The meat has been poached, so there's no oil or drying out.

Anyway, I'm really happy with the results that I'm seeing so far. I'm really looking forward to what the scale and the tape measure say Friday morning after the first week on this protocol. It's hard, don't get me wrong. Telling yourself you can't have the corn dog that your coworker is eating for lunch takes a lot of internal strength. And learning the difference between an empty stomach and a hungry stomach also takes a lot of work. I do dream about the foods I haven't been able to eat. And if I choose to do a second round of HCG, I'll definitely be satisfying those cravings, if they still exist. Since this is essentially a low-calorie South Beach/Atkins type deal, I can imagine that taste buds will change and become more accepting of food as fuel rather than pleasure. Cause I'll be damned if eating plain, dry spinach tastes anything like a rice krispie treat or baby back ribs.

My goal with doing this? Just anything, at this point. I've been stuck in such a rut over the last year. My weight loss stopped in 2008 due to my father getting sick and making daily flights between Seattle and Pullman for a week and a half. Then a few months later, my mother had a heart attack which was stressful; mostly because it bothered me that they didn't tell me she did until 11 hours after my dad took her to the hospital. They said they didn't want to worry me while at school. Seriously? I told them not to do that ever again. If something happens, you call me immediately no matter what I might be in the middle of. Anyway, back to goals. My short-term goal is getting to my driver's license weight of 197. While still overweight, I've always carried my weight very well and don't look like I weigh as much as I do. Several tests of lean tissue suggest that I'm about 31-38% fat, depending on when the analysis was done over the years. Once I reach something below 200, my real goal is about 165. I don't want to focus on a number as much as how clothing looks on me. And being able to buy even a size 12 would be amazing to me. Perhaps I should shoot for an 8 and call it good. I don't know. But I don't want to focus on that goal before I hit the first one.

That's all for now. Hopefully I get to posting daily about how I'm feeling, what I'm eating, and what my numbers are. If not, it'll be every other day. If this helps just one person want to change their life, that's all I need to make it feel worth the effort.